Sunday, November 20, 2011

A fat cat in Tel Aviv

The beautiful fat cat was sitting on the restaurant windowsill watching us as we picked our way along the rainslick street. Richard chucked him under the chin and the cat looked me up and down in a sideways glance. I could tell he didn't think much of me...they never do until the scraps start falling on the floor.

We got settled inside, ordered a couple of glasses of wine and noticed the party across from us near the windows, was smoking away. The cat moved over to the smoker's window and sat there staring in. Soon one of the smokers cracked the window and the cat's paw was in like a flash. The paw groped around aimlessly for a minute or so and then started to stretch and stretch and stretch. The smoker's ignored the cat gymnastics while Richard and I were laughing loud and hard. The cat didn't actually hook anything and withdrew his paw,looked at it and started to groom himself as embarrassed cats are wont to do. Another few minutes passed and one of the smokers cracked the window slightly more. incredibly quickly the cat flattened himself sideways and squeeZed in leaping over the smokers (who barely noticed...they were French and tres chic) and immediately began sucking up bits from the floor which he had quite obviously GPS'ed while he was outdoors peering in through the windows.

It was all too slick. We decided the whole scene was planned by the cat...he knew that smokers would open a window and chose his spot strategically. Not only that,but he had me pegged as a soft touch from the earlier assessment and didn't waste any time sucking up to the French or the other sophisticates. Straight over to our table and he went into a routine you wouldn't believe, purring, rubbing, rolling around. If the cat pulled out a "nose and glasses" I wouldn't have been surprised. He scored big time at our table and moved along when he saw the plates were empty. Oh he left us laughing but I felt cheap and used when he was done with us. Love 'em and leave 'em....that's the way it goes in the cat racket here in Tel Aviv.


  1. However shouldn't I be posting something more profound given the astonishing amount of stimulation here in Israel?
    My brain is so jammed up with chunks of history she's having problems moving the pieces into the appropriate spots, connecting the dots and getting everything organized. Perhaps I'm asking too much of the poor thing.
    The IPad is another challenge; I have a draft or two rife with typos and lack of paragraph breaks etc. Drives me a bit nuts. At least when a cat is the subject matter punctuation seems less critical.

  2. I hate the ipad. I really do. I took it on one of my last junkets and it is impossible to post with. You can't attach pictures and you can't scroll and edit. Ridiculous for serious writing. I would have been much better served with the new MacAir. Where are you eating in San Francisco? Let me know if you need a suggestion for a non thanksgiving meal.

  3. You know I would love that story. Too bad you didn't have a camera or whatever it is that people make movies with these days.

    Profound, silly... who cares...anything you write will be interesting.


  4. i love your cat story. Wish I could have seen that show. hilariously written.