Friday, January 11, 2013

Hard to Swallow Stories

My amiable seatmate in the vet's office, the owner of "approximately" 10 chickens, "roughly" 4 dogs, and some miscellaneous cats and rabbits asked me why I was there. She was vague about the numbers of her pets because county regulations limit the number of animals you can keep and after all, I was a perfect stranger. She was holding the leash on her arthritic, greying Airedale terrier, who had a heck of a time getting his footing on the smooth concrete floor. She'd help him get his legs together and while looking her in the eye balefully, his legs would slowly start sliding sideways from underneath him. Finally he chose to flop down on his side. Her big black bunny was in a pet carrier on the floor, waiting for his manicure. The rabbit's nail hygiene was the reason for their vet visit on this occasion.   

"My cat ate an ear plug. Intestinal blockage. Surgery.", I confessed.

She chortled, shifting her position slightly as she leaned in and asked, "Did they offer the plug to you? My dog ate a pair of pantyhose, got clogged up and after the surgery, they told me I could have them!" She was quick to add that she'd politely declined the offer. The vet's wife told us they'd once removed a thong from a dog's gut. My husband declared that there oughta be a "Wall of Shame" for display of this stuff at the Animal Hospital.

On another visit (we've been several times during this week), a woman told me her dog, apparently a gourmet, consumed 10 1/2 pounds of stones. Nobody asked her if she wanted them, but she was assured she held a foreign object weight record. My artist friend Barbara's dog ate stones and string simultaneously creating a kind of dog art necklace in it's gut. There's probably a market somewhere for this kind of thing, if coffee beans extracted from monkey poop are worth a fortune.

Take my word for it. If you're in a situation where you want to hear stories (some of them hard to swallow), declare during a lull in the conversation, "My cat got clogged up from eating an ear plug!" or  "My____________ swallowed a _______________". Everyone has a tail tale to tell.

The $1863 ear plug

1 comment:

  1. Even tho I've heard this story, reading about it made it even funnier. (not that it was a funny situation for your cat, but...). That photo with the price tag...priceless.