Saturday, February 20, 2010

Peeking Wok Investigations?

When you dial the Peking Wok for reservations you have to be very careful with the last digit which is an 8. If your finger slips and you press 0, you'll get a male voice which states, "Investigations". It sounds as if he's saying this out of the side of his mouth while a cigarette smolders in the other side. My mind immediately conjures up a very spare office with the answer-man sporting suspenders and a fedora sitting at a single desk equipped with only a telephone; a door with a transom, which you can see over his shoulder, has a frosted glass window bearing a sign: "Private Investigator".  Stupidly, I say,  "Er...well, this isn't the Peking Wok?" The male voice says "No dialed a 0 instead of the 8. Try again. Have a great meal."

Why do I ask him if it's the Peking Wok? Do I think they might have some kind of Investigation division, like the Peeking Wok? Or more bizarre, perhaps private detectives working the cook line to supplement their income? Can you see a line of fedora wearing, cigarette puffing guys stir-frying, chopping, mincing and answering the phone all at the same time? It wouldn't be the first time a restaurant had an unusual work force. The Pantry in downtown LA comes to mind. Rumor has it that at one time the wait staff were all ex-cons. Or Johnny Rockets whose staff are all would-be performers.

Pity the poor "Investigations" guy, cursed with receiving this kind of wrong number day after day after day. Or maybe not. Maybe every once in a while he gets someone who just happens to need both Chinese food and a private investigator at the same time. One or two of those a year and the "accidental" business might make up for the annoyance.


  1. This is hilarious. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

  2. I was going to try for a shadow shot today, but that isn't working out. Guess I'll have to continue with the deadly clean up.